Picking out which of the limes in the grocer’s basket is the greenest, the ripest, the worthiest, you finish off the thousands of man-hours that went into making them all identical. Agribusiness has taken the three stages of planting, harvest, and distribution and added a fourth, the preliminary genetic erasure of every difference between the specimens. Mass-market produce is aimed at a faceless public of interchangeable consumers who have forgotten both the variety of imperfect nature and the possibility of living a unique life. You need to pretend that one of the limes is perceptibly better than the others, because those limes in the basket are eerily reminiscent of the milling crowd in the store: that greenest, ripest lime is you.
Jamey Hecht is a poet, a scholar, an actor, a journalist, a teacher and a perennial student. His book “Limousine, Midnight Blue” is available from Amazon. His website is jameyhecht.com and you can find his informative and entertaining blog at Poetry, Politics, Collapse. He will be reading at the PondWater Society July event on Saturday, the 10th with Ellyn Maybe and her band, at The Cobalt Cafe on September 28th and back here to do a solo feature at the November event.
“I have made a satisfactory dinner . . . simply off a dish of purslan (Portulaca oleracea) which I gathered in my cornfield, boiled and salted. . . . Yet men have come to such a pass that they frequently starve, not for want of necessaries but for want of luxuries.”
Henry David Thoreau “Walden”
Purslane
Purslane is probably the most unappreciated vegetable that is sneakily growing in your yard. It is low in Cholesterol. It is also a good source of Thiamin, Niacin, Vitamin B6 and Folate, and a very good source of Vitamin A, Vitamin C, Riboflavin, Calcium, Iron, Magnesium, Phosphorus, Potassium, Copper and Manganese.* It is the best source of Omega 3 fatty acids of any leafy plant.
Purslane is wildly versatile, you can eat it by itself as a salad, I add a little lemon juice, salt and pepper, that’s it. In Mexico it is popular as a cooked vegetable and also used in stews both for flavor and as a thickener. In Greece, where the culinary and medicinal use of purslane dates back 2,000 years, it is served as a salad with a yogurt dressing. It can be pickled in apple cider vinegar with garlic cloves and peppercorns for use in the winter.
More purslane
If looking at these photos gets you a little upset and anxious because you’ve been fighting this “weed” for years, hopefully this information will give it a shot at redemption. The phenomenal success of this plant is due to the fact that a single specimen can produce up to 52,300 seeds and these seeds can survive for up to 30 years in undisturbed soil. It is tenacious and invasive and it’s not going away anytime soon, may as well make friends with it and take advantage of this excellent food source.
The reason that Thoreau found purslane in his corn field is that it is a perfect companion plant for corn, the long roots burrowing down first so that the corn roots can then follow. These same roots bring moisture and nutrients up to the surface for other plants to make use of. It is considered a beneficial weed even if you don’t eat it.
In his Naturalis Historia (circa AD 77-79), Pliny the Elder recommends wearing this succulent as an amulet to expel evil. Current quackery bestows the plant with anti-depressant qualities, among other “medical” uses.
Spurge invading the purslane
There is a weed that almost always accompanies purslane and when you’re harvesting, you’ll want to avoid it. Although Spurge shares some of the growth characteristics of purslane, it doesn’t really look all that similar. It can be tricky though and grow in with your harvest. If it does, you’re likely to notice it because it has a milky sap that is irritating to the skin. It’s something to watch out for because if you accidentally eat some, it will make you sick.
June 12, 2010 PondWater Society event
Kate Durbin with an introduction and poems by Peggy Dobreer
Kate Durbin signing my copy of "The Ravenous Audience"
Kate Durbin is a performance poet so elegant and refined that she seems other-worldly. For every performance, she invents a costume and makeup to entrance the audience and enhance the poems. Each one that I’ve seen, both live and in photos, has been delightfully creative and gorgeous. Many of the costumes are named by her collaborator, Carissa Ackerman of “Mandate of Heaven”, NY. For example there is a metallic gold costume called “The Crystal Allen” and another with a butterfly theme named the “Rockinghorsefly.” A blue costume with a silver headdress is dubbed by Kate “Lady Libertine”. The costume that she wore here is “The Ravenous Audience” and is featured in the photograph on the back of her book of the same name.
As Kate walked in on Saturday, you could hear the murmurs of “she’s so beautiful” float through the room like a spontaneous unanimous prayer. It would be too easy to make the assumption that a luminous angel such as this would be inapproachable; that would be a mistake. She is smart and sweet and very easy to talk to.
Kate does not shy away from controversy; she romances and dances with it, openly flirting. Her blog is entitled Ornament and Excrement and she is the co-founder with Meghan Vicks of “Gaga Stigmata” an online academic journal based on the life and work of Lady Gaga. In a recent interview she referred to the crucifixion as “the greatest performance art act”.
Kate Durbin spins rooms and worlds and psyches. From the moment that she walks in you feel disoriented and thrown into a different perspective. Her work is viciously descriptive, there is no quarter given. You are drawn in and dragged through. Her initial chapbook, “Fragments Found in a 1937 Aviator’s Boot” is an intimate account of Amelia Earhart and her flying partner Fred J. Noonan; their groundbreaking flight and harrowing demise. Kate read the book for us from start to finish, the only way it could be done, and it was intense and had the audience captivated. Kate does manage to make an audience ravenous.
Eddie and I are both very familiar with her work and between the two of us, we requested the most exhausting pieces. Thankfully Kate has some sense of what the cost is in reading these poems and just how ravenous an audience is and what we can all take. She read a lot of new work that we hadn’t heard before and it was just lush. I’m very excited to see what her next project will be in completion.
Peggy Dobreer and Kate Durbin. So glamorous.
Peggy Dobreer was so gracious as to be here and introduce Kate as well as read some beautiful work. She is so gregarious and bright, it is always so lovely to be in the same room with her. Peggy brings excitement with her and I always fall to laughing to tears within 10 minutes of her entrance. She is just so much fun. You know that she has a poem in the Poetry Machine, don’t you? It’s the “Poem to Get Laid”, “Kama Sutra”. Hot stuff!
Now I know that Hannah Wehr was booked and advertised but the poor little soul had strep throat and sounded so wounded when she called. Don’t worry for a minute about that, we’ll get her here and create a perfect atmosphere for her. I imagine another evening of ferocious goddesses coming soon.
We had such a great turnout, everyone was so generous and brought such lovely things. Lori McGinn made the most amazing oatmeal cookies with chocolate chips (she’s got a secret in those cookies that I want to know!), Peggy brought blueberries that were so succulent and sweet that I could write a poem about them even though I don’t do that. Oh my god! King Daddy made shortbread that was so memorable that I dream about it. Louise brought a home-made cheese spread that was delicious (I need that recipe!) as well as a smoked gouda and crackers. Jami walked in with a deli tray that was impressive! Todd brought a gorgeous Cabernet. What a feast we had! Kate made her entrance and it was so breathtaking and beautiful with a huge bouquet of flowers and a bottle of wine that will haunt me, it was so exquisite.
Colin and Kate entertaining each other
The room was insatiable. In the end we had the Q&A and Kate was eloquent and giving in all of her answers. She has a wonderful sense of humor, which is very necessary here.
We had prizes! We always have prizes but it’s so fun! John Simola donated the bouquet of flowers and Jami won them. We had two issues of Rattle donated by Tim and Megan Green and John Simola won one and Louise won the other. Peggy was so sweet to donate a copy of her book “Little Captures” and Jeanne Marie Spicuzza won that and Peggy signed it for her. Kate Durbin donated a copy of “Fragments Found in a 1937 Aviator’s Boot” and Lori McGinn won that. Next time I go to Vegas, I’m gonna go with Lori McGinn.
We had dinner afterward and I’ll post the recipe soon. Daniel McGinn took great photos and if you’re lucky enough to know him on FB, you know what I’m talking about.
Ellyn Maybe and her band at Pier 212 in Santa Monica every Thursday night
The next event will be on July 10th and Ellyn Maybe will be here with her band and it’s her birthday, we’ll have cake and sing! Jamey Hecht will also read and I’m hoping that he will read from his Sophocles translation, it’s so beautiful and has such depth that you can see it, feel it, smell it as he reads. If you haven’t heard or seen Ellyn Maybe you can find her here or you could do a very fun thing and check out her YouTube videos. She has books and a CD out that I am so in love with that I kind of can’t believe that she’s going to be performing just for us. The combination promises to be saturated just perfectly.
Although geography keeps us apart, my love, there are so many wonders observed in harmony. I lay on my back in the dew-soaked grass and gaze at the moon. I can feel that you are seeing the same beauty and are overcome by the same calm. We are connected by the moon and her stars. By the way, are the back of your pants and shirt wet?
Dearest one, when the sun lazily seeps through my curtains at dawn, I sense that you are feeling the warmth too. And, once again, we are connected.
As I venture out into someone else’s world I know that you view the very same world as I. The aroma of coffee wafts towards me from the doors of the 7-11, held open by a street person. Are you hearing the same story of needed gas money? Will you give him a dollar as I am?
Sweetheart, I miss you so, but my heart soars and I am somehow comforted when I stroll through Sears and realize that you may be eying the very same displays. Did you like that plaid jacket to the right of the main entrance? Me too, maybe I’ll go back and get it for you.
We are so separate, but one. I wonder, do you sense my love when you drive past your McDonald’s? Do you remember that I have the self same golden arches close to my home?
Ralph’s has run out of Ajax, I hope that you didn’t need some too.
If I could only transport myself to your Wal-Mart, or you to mine, we could be together once again.
But take heart! We will never stray far from one another, as long as we can experience each other in our retail sameness. We will always remain as one.
I was typing an email about how much baffling shit I type. Not only how much I type but the fact that I have the audacity to send it out to someone that I care about and then never look at it again because I’m scared to death to see what it was that I wrote. There is some sort of Hallmark wannabe that churns out an overly cute “Merlot and Email Don’t Mix” statuette for the purposes of humorous gift giving. I’d like to blame my confessions du jour on alcohol, but I cannot. I’ve done extensive testing and I’m just as much of a dumbass when I’m sober. Also, as a somewhat functioning alcoholic, I have to have some guidelines. One of them is that I’m not allowed to use alcohol as an excuse for any sort of behavior, good or bad. The moment I do, I’m fucked.
Then I started typing about all of the theories I come up with in cave-man mentality and send before I give myself the gift of thinking about it for two seconds. You would not believe the “brilliant” ideas I come up with on the fly. I keep hoping that I’ll learn from these experiences, but honestly, it’s been going on since I had to use an IBM Selectric to humiliate myself via the US Postal Service. None of this is new. I don’t know how that happened. I used to be so nice and quiet. But, at some point, I reverted to just blurting out anything that I think the moment I think it, but on paper or its equivalent. Nothing makes sense to me, are any lessons ever learned?
I looked at what I had written in this email, none of it seemed very personal, it was all about me, every paragraph started with “I” and I thought “why am I typing all this crap to this one beloved when I could broadcast it to everyone on my blog!?” So, I copied the text and then opened my browser. And there is Facebook and there is something that I MUST comment on. So then it went back and forth and when I had a second, I went back to my email program, looking for that text. Now, you know where it was, but I had no idea. I’m pretty sure that I spent a good 10 minutes trying to figure out where that text was. I looked in my drafts folder and was a little shocked at what I found there, that was distracting and I deleted a lot of very terrible things that should have never been written. I kept looking for that damned email. Finally it dawned on me and I remembered exactly where that typing was.
So I opened this and pasted and I saw a question mark. Literally, a question mark. My keyboard is broken and the question mark key is silent and so I find myself cruising the net for a question mark that I can copy and paste. It turns out that I ask a lot of questions and I need a few cases of question marks.
Rick Lupert reading at Mindy Nettifee's "The Ladies Have the Floor" event
Rick Lupert came here one time. You might not believe this, but he really did. He came in through the back door and scared the crap out of me. I mean, you know, you’re sitting around in your living room, talking to some people, and you look up and there is Rick Lupert, all quiet and Lupertish. I don’t know what you would do in this situation, but I attempted to feed him and get him a beverage, that’s kind of my “go to” solution when this sort of thing happens. Fortunately I knew that Rick Lupert is fond of cheese, in particular, Brie, so I had that on hand. He might seem mild mannered but I never trust that and I’ve become convinced that a well-fed poet, is a good poet.
Rick is such a good poet. He is understated and subtle and things sneak up and you find yourself laughing like a hyena. Now, I realize that not all poetry is funny, and there is a great lot of it that is very deep and can keep you thinking for hours or a lifetime. Some of it can make you cry or feel dirty or despondent. But the poetry that makes you laugh out loud when you unexpectedly think about it two weeks later while you’re doing the dishes; I really love that. Rick Lupert is going to get me institutionalized. Trust me, bursting out in laughter while you’re doing the dishes can seem like odd behavior. Thank god I don’t have an office job anymore, Rick Lupert would get me fired for sure. He’s dangerous, really, do not trust that calm, reasonable demeanor.
You know, these things are supposed to start at 4. But word has gotten out that the reading doesn’t start until 5 and so every month it gets a little later. That’s okay with me, summer is coming, the days are getting longer, people stay later, it’s all fantastic and somewhat organic. So now the reading was even later than usual because The Poets in Distress were really freaking out that they would miss it and they were on the way and I didn’t want them to miss Rick Lupert or Colin Baines and I certainly didn’t want to miss The Poets in Distress because they are just such good company. It all turned out quite well, Mr. P and his girlfriend Dawn arrived and let us know that King Daddy and Betty Nude were on the way and so we just spent another 10 minutes or so eating and drinking and smoking or whatever. We’re pretty good at entertaining each other.
There is a very good chance that you know exactly who Rick Lupert is. But I’m going to type this anyway because I like saying it. Rick Lupert has hosted a weekly open mic reading at the Cobalt Cafe in The Valley since 1994. I’m not going to do the math or count the years, but that’s a really long time. In my opinion hosting an open mic takes the patience of a Saint. A really good, patient Saint. It takes a sense of humor and a diplomacy that not many people have. People are questionable and you just never know what they are going to do. Every week Rick invites them up on the stage and gives them access to a microphone, just willy nilly, no questions asked, no applications to fill out. That’s wild! And when things start to go a little south, Rick handles it with aplomb and turns the evening around and makes it all good again.
Along with the open mic, he also hosts featured poets. When a poet features at the Cobalt, Rick creates a broadside of one of their poems. They go for a dollar a piece and the proceeds go to the featured reader. He is a talented graphic artist and so these broadsides are quite sought after. Personally, I would like to have all of them, every single one.
He’s just such the Elvis of Cool.
Colin Baines reading at the Lightbulb Mouth Radio Hour
Oh! Well, anyway, everyone got settled and in honor of Rick Lupert and his crazy ways of just letting anyone read who wants to we invited a stranger to come to our house and read without ever having met him or heard or seen his work. I’m telling you, I don’t do this, it was purely for the sake of Rick and his comfort in the not knowing. I will grudgingly admit that it worked out to everyone’s benefit and Rolland Vasin did a wonderful reading of two very powerful poems. Turns out that Rick has the most excellent stalkers. Next came Colin Baines, who I am quite familiar with, he read four poems for us and was just wonderful. I will post videos, you don’t have to take my word for it.
By this time I want a break. It’s not so much that I’m antsy, it’s more that I want to be able to think about what I’ve just heard and sort of cleanse my palate for the next reader. It’s a lot, you know? And I just love it so much that it’s a lot.
Mr. Baines does such a great job with the introductions. I have so much appreciation and so many words for these artists but if I stood up in front of everyone and tried to pry them out, I would fall over and need CPR. I just can’t physically do it. He can and does and every month he is more creative and eloquent. If Rick Lupert walked in your back door, you’d want to give him a good intro, I’m sure of it.
I had never seen Rick feature. We’ve seen him host and read and he did the most amazing fun thing at Lightbulb Mouth in Long Beach, where he was the “informationalist” and taught us all about kissing (if you click on that link, you can hear it for yourself). He’s published 12 books, count ‘em, twelve! And every one is a thing to behold. In addition to the 12 printed books, there are 4 e-books available for free on his website, you can just download them whenever you want to, I’m telling you, he’s really crazy like that. I’ve loved his work on the page but it was so wonderful to hear him read, he has the poise and the voice that provide the perfect delivery system for these poems. If you see that he is reading somewhere or you get a chance to go to the Cobalt, go! If you cannot, don’t cry or be too upset, I’m already working out another date with him to read here again.
The Poetry Machine
He IS the Poetry Machine. It was a lovely coincidence that we unveiled The Poetry Machine that very evening and Rick just happened to have a poem in it. Actually, he was the first poet to have a poem in it in this house. A number of people have heard me gushing about The Poetry Machine and made the assumption that it’s a metaphor for some deep, dark secret I’ve got hidden in the closet spouting out poetry. My referring to Rick Lupert as the Poetry Machine probably doesn’t help matters much. But, look, it’s here, it’s real, and it works! Lori McGinn gave it a Vegas style workout and that girl mastered the machine (she also brought the most incredible peanut butter cookies!). There’s no going back now.
We’ve added more poems, more poets and I cannot wait for the next event, on the 12th, so that everyone can try it out. I need to tell you about this machine. It’s not really mine; I love it a lot and it can come here to stay whenever it needs a soft place to fall, but it really does belong to David Shook. He obtained the original 1964 candy machine and turned it into a vehicle for poetry. I saw a photo of it and said to myself “I must have that!” and amazingly enough, David was kind enough to let me play with it. It has been such a fun project, gathering the poems, experimenting with the packaging, greasing the wheels, every time I look over my shoulder and see it grinning back at me it makes me so happy. Now, I realize that this thing is too glorious to be satisfied in this living room, it is bound to leave me and go on tour, but in the meantime, I just keep feeding it and polishing it and the thing that’s cool is that it always delivers.
As far as the door prize goes, it was a pretty wild night. Our neighbor, John Simola, donated a stained glass piece that he had done, as well as the usual flower arrangement that he is famous for, the one’s with the flowers made out of dollar bills. Mr. P, from the Poet’s in Distress, won the stained glass piece and Daniel McGinn won the flower arrangement. We had two issues of Rattle, generously donated by Tim Green and one of them went to Todd Krause and the second was won by Jeannette Baines. Todd Krause just happens to be the Senior Master Builder at the Fender Custom Shop (you would not believe the the famous guitars that Todd has built, AND he helped build our bass kalimba) and he donated a Fender lunch bag and Dawn won that, lucky girl, it is quite stylish. I’d show it off. And the last prize was a full set of the poems from The Poetry Machine and Betty Nude won those.
Speaking of Betty Nude, I would like to thank her for being so helpful with the dish duty after dinner, that was really above and beyond and I appreciated it so much. As usual we had a ridiculous amount of fun and I feel so fortunate to be associated with such talented and wonderful people. Now I’ll show you some videos just so we’ll know that I didn’t make this all up.
Colin’s Poetry Playlist.
Rick Lupert getting me institutionalized or fired…
And here is a list of all of the most beloved poets who are in The Poetry Machine at this moment:
Colin Baines
Brendan Constantine
Peggy Dobreer
Timothy Green
Jamey Hecht
Douglas Kearney
Rick Lupert
Daniel McGinn
William Shakespeare
Victor Teran translated by David Shook
Hannah Wehr
Leigh White
Thank you so much to every gorgeous soul who is involved in this. It is just so hot, hot, hot!
Kate Durbin reading at The Gypsy Den in Santa Ana
The next event, on June 12th, will feature the most ferocious goddesses of poetry, Kate Durbin and Hannah Wehr with an introduction by the enchanting Peggy Dobreer! Oh, we really are very lucky people.
Hanna Wehr reading at Mindy Nettifee's "The Ladies Have the Floor" event
This was so different from anything that we’ve done that I think I’ll tell you about it with photos. Barry McLaughlin (also known as Barry Holiday) came and wowed us with trivial fun, games and prizes!
It all started very quietly. You can see the unfinished Poetry Machine sitting expectantly in the corner.
Barry arrives, like Felix the Cat, with his magic bag of tricks!
Bobby (who is Not Steve) is amused in spite of himself, Todd is just purely amused.
Julie and Alexandra facing the wall while Barry is in the kitchen hiding the hedgehog.
Barry Hiding the Hedgehog
Julie doesn't even bother to look for the hedgehog, but instead uses her time to refill her wine glass. This is an example of why we've been friends since we were 17.
Alexandra found the hedgehog. She is a Baines - She WILL win!
Barry challenging an audience member. The television is set up there so that he could show very short, funny films called Nuggets.
Barry being a target.
Rebecca & Colin. I can't remember if this was a challenge or a prize.
Bulls eye!
My first instinct is to feel bad for this, but then I remember that it was his game and he is the one that thought it was a good idea to give Rebecca a weapon. Don't ever give anyone in this house a weapon.
Barry explaining the rules for the game How Many Peeps Are In This Can? while Jules and Todd pay rapt attention. Jules won the peeps. The can too, I think.
The audience was divided into three teams; the winners, the weiners, and the whiners. The whiners won and everyone got candy bars!
Because it was April and both Alexandra and Julie have birthdays in April we decided that after dinner we would have a pinata. We've never had a pinata before and it's fairly clear that no one else that was here had either. It was full of candy, disposable lighters, disposable razors and little bottles of vodka.
Horror fiction writer, Pamila Payne, was first at bat.
Eddie pulled the string, some sort of pinata trickery that I don't understand, I mean, she's already blindfolded, how is a person ever supposed to hit the thing? The pinata got stuck in the tree.
Todd released it, he's very tall and that often comes in handy.
Alexandra was supposed to go next, but for some misguided reason she chose to let Todd go before her. This is Alexandra trying to spin Todd around. No, really, how many disadvantages does one need against a pinata?
Here we go. I do not know what Todd has against pinatas, but the desire for vengeance is so apparent here.
Well, I guess this shows that there were not enough disadvantages. Todd beheaded the thing on the first swing, game over. I'm pretty sure that we were supposed to have some kids and a stick, not Todd and a baseball bat, but this is how you learn. Well, maybe not you, but this is how I learn. The other thing I learned is that adults will not scramble around in the grass for pinata innards. I think that it was at this point that Alexandra said so we just come out here in the morning for candy and liquor?
These poets, who I have admittedly invited in, are smashing me. I cannot tell you how much joy that brings to me. They come in all nice and polite. They mingle and converse and banter and fraternize. And then the next thing you know, they have taken over the room! They are stomping on all of us, dragging us through the mud, digging us up out of the mire and smearing us with chocolate frosting and sprinkles. I find myself grinning like an idiot. It’s just such an incredible ride.
You know, Brendan walks in the room and the room gets bigger, brighter, shinier. He smiles at you and you feel like you’ve been blessed. And you might think to yourself “well, this guy is covering because nobody has all that and good poetry too”, but it turns out that he has both. Almost criminal, really, that lucky guy. Now, what if I tell you that not only does he have both but he shares everything. I mean he will shine on you and then read a poem that will add to your frame of reference and become a part of your soundtrack. This is a gift. This is the best example of what a great poet does that I can give you and Brendan is a great poet. I will no longer think “from top to bottom”, I will always hear “cellar to weathervane”.
And he’s a teacher. I mean, a real teacher. He is accessible and informative and if there is one thing that you don’t understand, he will fill you in without making you feel like you should have known that.
Am I a fangirl? Yeah. But I didn’t write all of the above because of that. I am Fangirl because of all of the above. I know a good thing when I read it.
Here’s a thing; I knew that Jamey Hecht was going to be here and so I asked him if he would introduce Brendan. At the last moment I started thinking about that and it occurred to me that I would be an idiot to have Jamey in the house and not ask him to read some things. He’s working on fantastic new material, both poems and short stories and I hoped that he would read some for us. I know that I’ve written about his book “Limousine, Midnight Blue” quite a lot, but what you might not know is that he’s really funny too. And fun! Here, I’ll show you…
He read two more new poems and a short story (Tim, the Immortal Giraffe Visits Marvin Gaye) and then he read one of Brendan’s poems (Gravelock) and did a wonderful introduction.
Brendan read some poems from his book “Letters to Guns“, but he read a lot of poems that I had not heard before and that was thrilling because every single poem hit the mark. He read and no one wanted him to stop. I think that if it was up to the audience, he would still be reading, now, weeks later, like one of those skeletons in “The Pirates of the Caribbean”. He finished with this one and you can see from the audience response that it was poetry mayhem…
At Brendan’s request Jamey read another short story (“Tim the Immortal Giraffe Sticks up For Kids”) that had everyone roaring. I only hope that Tim makes his way into a book someday, he is so erudite and charming and goes on such fascinating adventures.
The videos are getting better. The photography is far more interactive and I am so scattered and so involved in enjoying the evening that it often gets forgotten. The music playlists for before and after are very often well thought out, but not always. I promise you that I am doing my best to archive every sensory aspect of every event.
Remember when Todd was the Raffle king? Well, Peggy Dobreer is now tied for that reign. She was here and now I’m kicking myself for not asking her to read, her work is so wonderful and I’m pretty sure that she would have if I had had my wits about me to ask her. I won’t make that mistake again! OK, so those two are tied, but Pamila Payne happened to come over that night and she won! I hope that you know our neighbor, John Simola, by now. He’s the guy that makes the most fun flower arrangements with roses made from $$$ and he also does glass etching, glass fusion, and stained glass pieces. He made and donated another floral arrangement and Pamila won!
If you haven’t met Pamila Payne yet, you will. She writes horror fiction and she does it well. I am so happy to know her and we have some fun things in the works that I’m just not ready to tell you about yet, but you know that I will!
Barry Holiday and Sweet Tony Beans
This week. This coming Saturday is going to be insane. I’m very, very late in writing this and so the next one is coming down on my head. It’s April! April Fool’s! And there are many beloved birthdays (Alexandra, Julie, Peggy) and it just so happens that Barry Holiday is going to be here. No poetry this month, just madness.
Barry is writing a show just for us and bringing people to be in it. I think that you should be here. There will be candy. Wait a minute. You don’t know who Barry Holiday is? Really? Let me just read you his press release…
“Barry Holiday is the world’s greatest entertainer. He’s also the founder of The Grand Re-Awakening, a self-realization process whereby one learns to “Unleash the Dragon.” After leaving a Barry Holiday Experience, you may find yourself asking “What the hell just happened, and why do I feel so damn good?” That’s The Barry Holiday Promise.®”
And that is the Barry Holiday promise. I’ve never seen him break it.
One last glimmer of info. Brendan is organizing a new poetry series in Venice at Beyond Baroque that you should know about. All of the info is gathered here. We’ve been twice and it is soooo much fun!
The Guinea Hen - go ahead and click, she'll get bigger and look down on you.
Well, I wondered how long it would take for the guinea hen to reach a comfort level with poetry readings and feel it was safe to attend one. I got my answer, during the 5th event, on Saturday the 13th of February, she waltzed in through the doors and right up to Peggy Dobreer during her reading and introduced herself. It was not subtle. And, trust me, the guinea was not the only one cackling. But Peggy is not a neophyte and not one to be upstaged! It takes a professional to read here and that she is. She brought her brand new chapbook and I have to tell you that it is so beautiful, I was duly impressed. I will find out from her where to get it and post it here. It’s called “Little Captures” and I just love every word of it. When I read it, I feel like I’m in it.
I do plan to tell you more about the readings, but I want to type some observations about the boisterous audience here, the regulars. There are many people I’ve spoken with and invited to these events who just will not attend, no matter how much they care for us as friends or family. Mostly I hear things like “I hate poetry”, or “I don’t understand poetry” or even “poetry’s not my bag, man”. A couple of brave souls have admitted to just not understanding poetry and feeling intimidated by it, or the fear of looking stupid. Of the people who do come, there are only a few who have any real familiarity with poetry and if any of them write poems, they’re doing it in secret. I appreciate our guests so much because almost all of them have overcome some form of prejudice or fear of the unknown in order to participate. And they keep coming back!
I’ve thought about that a lot, these open-minded, adventurous souls who come here to laugh or gasp, and learn. Some might come for the brownies or Jenny’s Beer Bread, but from the rapt attention the artists receive and the comments afterward, I really think that the credit goes to the artists who usually drive across a sprawling city to get here. The vast majority of them are educators either by profession or nature and all of them are passionate about their work. The sort of passion that is contagious and exciting.
The Q & A that takes place at the end has become integral, it’s not only fun, and usually hysterical, but enlightening, we always learn something, not just about the artist as a person, but also about their craft, whether it’s poetry, acting, dancing, essay writing, building fine furniture, making music, guitars, comedy.
So, I would like to say to anyone who has considered attending but feels like they might not fit in or belong; you should be here! I’ve never seen such a diverse crowd of people in one smallish room. No one fits in or belongs, but everyone does.
Get this… Peggy wrote a poem for me! And she started her reading with it. Want to see it? OK.
Poema for Joanne Q. Baines
Auntie had the whole idea summed up. It would be
her next project. She would write instructions
on colored index cards. No. She wouldn’t, she would
commit them to memory, one by one, so no one
could snatch her plan. She would serve coffee
and Crispy Cremes; devil’s food variety, glazed.
The sugar would make everyone giddy, then she
would lower the boom, insist on utter compliance,
show any misguided naysayers politely to the door.
I am so honored by this that I cannot help telling everyone all about it, the checkout girl at the market knows and is just sick of hearing about it.
Now, if you show up late, like towards the end of Peggy’s reading, and I haven’t seen you in 20 years or so, there’s a good chance that I will jump up and scream out your name and draw everyone’s attention to you. I was not aware that I would react like that, I would have liked to have thought that I’d show a little more grace, but none of us knows what we’ll do in such a situation until it happens. Poor Forrest. He recovered quickly though and Peggy and Jenny only heckled him a little bit. Funny turnaround, that, the performers heckling the audience, but I’ll have to admit that when his phone rang during Jenny’s reading, he kind of deserved it. He wasn’t aware of the shenanigans we’ve had with Dexter and the Guinea Hen, didn’t realize that a puny little ring tone was nothing compared to the animal distractions. Hopefully, once he learned of that, he didn’t feel too badly about it.
Jenny read five essays AND brought beer bread! All 5 essays are on YouTube but I’ll post one here too. It’s hard to decide which one, I love all of her work so much. I give, I’ll admit a partiality to this one because it was the first piece that I saw her do…
Do you see what I mean? I still laugh so hard that my eyes are all watery as I type this. I can’t recommend the other videos enough, they’re all funny. You can hear the guinea kicking up a fuss in “Resolutionary Road” because we were laughing too loudly and she was trying to go to bed.
Guess who won the raffle? That’s right, it was Forrest! He won a copy of Peggy’s book and she signed it for him. Terri won a copy of “Rattle” and Peggy won the flower arrangement that John Simola made and donated, again!
Brendan Constantine at RED(D)RESS at Beyond Baroque
On Saturday the 13th of this month Brendan Constantine will be here. If you’re reading this, I’m guessing that you know me, and if you know me, you’ve heard me singing the praises of Brendan and his book “Letters to Guns”. Brendan is phenomenally talented, charming, charismatic and I’ve never seen anyone support the poetry community, or any community, as energetically and passionately as he does. He seems to somehow defy physics in the amount that he does. His new series, RED(D)RESS, at Beyond Baroque in Venice had it’s debut a couple of weeks ago and was a smashing success. You can get more information on that here.
For some reason this box makes 6 batches, the Costco version makes 5
1. Go to Costco and buy that giant box that says “Ghirardelli Triple Chocolate Brownie Mix”
2. Follow the directions for “24 Extra Thick Brownies” except add a 3rd egg. It gives them a little more lift. Sometimes I add walnuts or pecans.
You’ll be able to do this twice and then you’ll be stuck with a single pouch of brownie mix. It’s ok; if you buy another box, you’ll have a match for that single.
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